Life would be so much simplier

25 03 2012

If only I could just ‘settle down’ and want what most people want. Perhaps we’re all doomed to secretly long for something we don’t or can’t have, I don’t really believe that. But I also don’t think it should be this complicated or difficult. Le sigh.

Seriously though, while out I was thinking how much simpler my life would be if I wanted the things that I am ‘supposed’ to want. Such as: kids, a husband, a house with a yard and garage, a normal settled down family life.… yadda yadda. The whole prospect bores me to tears. I genuinely dislike children, and honestly in spite of those who go on about biological clocks, as I get older I’m even less enchanted with rug rats. I freely admit I like kids in certain doses, but it seems I also like it if it’s regulated like with teaching. I’m disgustingly fond of the majority of my students, but just hanging out all day with people’s kids drives me bananas… Like here for example, because I’m often the girl in the group the kids usually come to me and yammer at me in French. What? Hu? Don’t bloody mumble… no you can’t use my computer, which I have already told you 15 times. God what do you want now… I don’t know where your damn toys are go look for them yourself. Oh so go to the car and get them… why the hell do I have to go with you.. turn on the light.. or how about ask your father… yes that guy over there … JESUS WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW… go away… You know I think most old people are just pretending to be deaf so they don’t have to listen to you. (lol none of this is my boyfriend’s kid, he’s a whole different can of worms).

I do not want kids. Let me repeat that for the slow among you. I do not … in anyway want to procreate, rip my bits asunder having a baby, just to be tied… pretty much forever to someone who I may grow to hate. That’s another thing I don’t get… people usually think long and hard before getting married, well some do anyway. But they don’t give it’s a moment’s thought before having a kid with someone. Um hello, at least with marriage if it turns out to be a grievous error you can Read the rest of this entry »





So What Is It Then?

1 05 2010

I’ve been thinking about it… and this whole being specific about what you want is.. well to put it frankly .. bull shit.

I have thought about it lately.  And recently I had an epiphany.

At the urging of several people I know, authors I respect, just trying to figure things out etc.  and a while back I wrote this post [Dear Universe] trying to detail what it is I want.  The other day I was thinking about it… and I realized everything I wrote was total BS, I mean sure these things may or may not be important to me but is it really, I mean REALLY what I want?

Sure, but to be honest when I wrote it, I was grasping at straws.  I didn’t know what to write so I forced myself to write something.  Everything says you need to be as specific as you can, and I tried to do that, but the reality is specific doesn’t mean shit if it isn’t right.   It was right, it is true.. but is it what  I really want?

I wrote another post about [getting what you want] which honestly when I went back a read it, I thought damn this girl knows what she’s talking about.  (Isn’t that a fricken laugh).  Well remember step one?  Yeah.. making lists about things you kinda maybe want because you need to make the list isn’t really the sa Read the rest of this entry »





Make Your own Happiness

25 08 2009

Have you ever noticed that when you want something, and then you don’t get it, you don’t seem to really care?  Now that you can’t have it, what ever it was becomes less attractive.  You don’t really want it anymore.

It’s an actual thing!  This video is super interesting, it talks about how we naturally trend toward making ourselves happy and satisfied.

If something we want becomes unavailable we begin to lose interest, also and I found this extra interesting, apparently once we make a decision we instantly begin to Read the rest of this entry »