AlleyCats, Very Disapointing

I guess I should have gone in it’s hey day, although I have been once before a year or so ago and my impression from that visit was meh too.  Last time it wasn’t particularly exciting but it wasn’t especially disappointing either.  I remember thinking the pizza was nice, but not really worth all the hype and to be frank.. not worth they money it costs.

It was my friend who actually asked me to remove his real name from my blog (insert eyeroll here) birthday (aka Frostfox) and we all went to dinner at Alleycats.  We went to the original store, which when I said I wasn’t so impressed last year everyone said I had to go to.

Well as far as first (or second) impressions go, they failed.  HORRIBLY.  Best pizza in Taipei?  Really I think I would have preferred Napoli, you know the greasy cheap shit that costs a couple of bucks.

I ordered the Napoletana: Fresh Tomato, Goat Cheese, Anchovies, Olives and Spinach.  I swapped out a couple of ingredients.. (anchovies for Italian sausage), and mmm sounds delish right!

Well, the whole experience was a disaster.  I asked them to separate my bill, I even ordered completely separate from the other people at the table.  And at the end they Just threw my stuff in with the bill, not a big deal but an annoying detail.  And before you dance around about how the mean white girl is picking on the Chinese serving staff, I speak Chinese and I told them in Chinese.

The food came at ridiculous intervals, seriously the first person had been finished his meal before the seconds to last person was given his food.  Two of the Calzonis were burned, one was a little messed up the other looked suspiciously puck like.  But they were guys and you know how guys are, they often either don’t care or can’t be bothered to complain to the waitress.  It wasn’t like we had a huge party of people or the orders were particularly complex.  And honestly for 380NT, ($14 Cad), you’d think they could manage to give you a Calzoni that is cooked properly!

When my pizza came the first thing I noticed was the tomato had been cooked.  WTF?  Fresh tomato on a Pizza means, fresh, uncooked tomato is put on the pizza after it comes out of the oven.  And YES I’m sure, I used to work at a pizza place.  I wasn’t upset about it, I just got up and explained the situation to the waitress.  And I got LIP!! Seriously????  She tells me that’s not what fresh tomato means…. Well maybe not in Chinese but as the menu is in English, I’m telling you that FRESH Tomato means uncooked on a pizza.   I mean really.. what the hell else would it mean?  Not old and moldy?  Not frozen?  Are these really things we use on a pizza?

But they did (after a little tiff) throw some fresh tomato on my pizza. Now this Pizza costs like, 500 nt for a 12″ ($17.50 CAD) and it has all kinds of yummy things on it so I’m really looking forward to it.  I take a bite.. yum, then I take another.. and get a massive clump of what appears  to be previously frozen or stewed spinach.   Instead of using nice spinach I’m convinced they scrapped the bottom of a barrel for the old, had gone bad shit to put on my pizza.  And then they didn’t have the decency to spread a nice thin layer out.. instead just a couple of big ass clumps on each slice.

Needless to say I was NOT impressed.  I had the rest of the pizza the next day, second day pizza yum! And the spinach had gotten even grosser… Really?  the only reason I ate it was because I wasn’t willing to throw away such expensive food.  I bought it and I was eating it…

But I did not enjoy it AT ALL.  There is no way in hell I’m going back.  Between the crap service, poor quality of ingredients and the burning of others food I can safely say it is not only NOT the best pizza in town.  I think it give Worst Pizza in town a run for it’s money, especially if you factor in how much it costs.

I’m sure many people have been there many times and had lovely experiences, perhaps it was just a bad day for them.  But I’ve spoken to a few people since last Saturday and they have all said the same thing, Alleycats has really gone down hill recently.

I do not recommend you wasting your money, but if you want to go anyway here are the addresses and numbers.

The original:

麗水店Li Shui
02-2321-8949
台北市麗水街6-1號B1
B1 No.6 Li Shui St, Taipei

Zhong Xiao:

忠孝店Zhong Xiao
02-2731-5225
台北市忠孝東路4段248巷2號
No.2 Lan 248 XhongXiao E.Rd.
Sec. 4, Taipei

Song Ren (near 101):

松仁店Song Ren
02-8780-5421
台北市松仁路 285號
No.285 Song Ren Rd.,Taipei

Hsimen:

西門店Ximen
02-2370-8858
台北市成都路10巷49號2樓
2F. No.49, Alley10 Chengdu Rd.,Taipei

Tienmu:

天母店Tien Mu
02-2835-6491
台北市中山北路六段35巷31號
No.31 Lane 35 Chung Shan N. Rd.
Sec. 6, Tien Mu
near ZhiShan MRT Station

Neihu:

內湖店Nei Hu
02-2630-6278
台北市內湖成功路5段67-1號
No.67-1 GR. Sec.5,Neihu

Hua Shan:

華山店Hua Shan
02-23956006
台北市八德路一段一號
No.1, Sec.1, Bade Rd., Taipei